8 Annoying Questions from Relatives You Can't Avoid If You're a Young Adult

 'I had only two choices: I could throw punches, or I could throw punch lines', said Twinkle Khanna in an episode of The Icons, and I immediately resonated with her. I figured it's safer for me to throw my thoughts equivalent to punches and chokeslams here. Why? Because using humour as a coping mechanism isn't illegal in comparison to my wild urge to return every smack-worthy question from nosy relatives with blows. 

Some relatives are notorious for throwing tone-deaf comments and questions that trigger our anxiety, if not our irritation. For goodness' sake, it's downright annoying to be answerable to every other curious Naro or Kevi (not directed to anyone in particular)! 

Here are some irritating questions (+ comments) from inquisitive relatives that you most definitely have come across as a young adult. I've also added my unfiltered response so if anyone feels offended reading this blog, I suggest you put things into perspective and reflect on whether you are guilty of throwing some of these questions.

1. 'Aren't you worried about your future?'

No, since you do the worrying on my behalf, I'll just relax. Maybe you'd be running an empire by now if you worried about your prospects half as much as you worry about me worrying about my future. Jokes aside, every youngster is bound to receive this inevitable question sooner or later. 

2. 'So...how much are you earning?'

Why? Are you contributing to world peace with this knowledge? While some people ask out of mere curiosity, some make it their business to dig out your financial information. If someone is tight-lipped about their earnings, stop grilling them and just let them be. It's okay to be like Jon Snow and know nothing about other people's affairs in this regard.

3. 'When are you getting married?'

Whenever I'm ready since people like you motivate me to remain single until I hear the bells. They treat you like a child till the age of 25, and once you hit 26, they expect you to run a household, eh? When did we grow up? I have a Pandora's box of questions waiting for answers.

4. 'Why don't you apply for government jobs?'

And give up my best years in the process just like you did? No thank you. In all seriousness, it's okay if someone finds their calling in that area. However, it's also our prerogative to be able to choose our career path, be it a state/central affiliated job or a low-key hustle. What more could be an instant mood killer than receiving unsolicited career-related advice followed by judgement? It's time that Naga people drop the archaic mindset of feeling sorry for those without a government job.

5. 'Shouldn't you settle down before 30?'

So that I can satisfy your idea of the ideal life? Yes, we are aware that our biological clock is ticking. But this opinionated question adds unnecessary pressure, especially when we have so much on our plates already. Also, when it comes to the pressure of settling down before 30, women have it worse than men. 

6. 'What happened to your face...so many pimples?'

...Followed by 'Don't you take care of your skin?', 'Why don't you apply this elixir from FY?' Oh, I am trying out this new look and loving it. Do you want to know how to get hormonal pimples in your best years? Because I have no idea! But, thanks for the confidence booster. I'll say less because only people with acne will understand. 

7. 'Why don't you ever gain some more weight?'

I think you should worry more about you gaining more sense than asking that question to somebody born skinny, and struggling to put on kilos all their life. Even an innocent question coming from pure intentions hurts people dealing with weight troubles. Let's practice empathy, yeah? Skinny shaming is just as serious as fat shaming. And, never tell them to 'eat more or the wind will blow you away.'

8. 'OMG how did you gain so much weight?' 

Just like how you gained stupidity. And obviously, because I hogged up like a starved pig and skipped exercise for a year due to depression during the lockdown (let me also tell you that it reeks of body-shaming). That's probably your first thought regardless of whether some people struggle with underlying health issues. Might we think twice before proceeding with weight-related questions, please?

Don't Be that Insensitive Relative

The life of a young adult entails having to experience frequent bouts of stress and anxiety aside from amazing perks. Growing up in a Naga community, I've seen many, not all, in my circle being oblivious to the amount of stress young adults face. People around my age group and I are constantly trying our best amidst huge pressure. We can do better than being the reason for triggering somebody's anxiety with seemingly harmless questions in the guise of well-meaning intentions and curiosity.